Midlife is the time to show up, be seen and grow into your gifts.
To shed the armor that holds you back and go forth to become all you can be.
”I think midlife is when the universe gently places her hands upon your shoulders, pulls you close, and whispers in your ear: I’m not screwing around. It’s time. All of this pretending and performing – these coping mechanisms that you’ve developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt – have to go. Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all the thing is you needed to feel worthy of love and belonging, but you’re still searching and you’re more lost than ever. Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You can’t live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through you. You were made to live and love with your whole heart. It’s time to show up and be seen.”
It’s time alright.
Time to become all you’re meant to be. To grow into your full magnificent self
What’s your armor?
Mine was founded in perfectionism that began when I was a young girl. By the time I was an adult, perfectionism was the puppet master and I was the perfect puppet. It wasn’t until I read Brene Brown’s first book, The Gifts of Imperfection a few years ago that I saw my perfectionism for what it was, the ‘perfect’ mask, hiding the fear of being not enough. Letting it go and releasing the armor has been the equivalent of setting myself free. What helped the process more than anything was understanding I am more able to love and be love-able as my real imperfect, vulnerable self. That ‘understanding’ was the key that allowed the ‘concept’ of perfectionism to move from my head into my heart where change could take place.
It’s time to live Big instead of small.
A friend of mine was a stay at home mom for over 20 years. She was the mom who uncompromisingly championed her 4 kids but who preferred to stay quietly in the background. In her late 40’s something began to shift. Her heart called her to reach out to other women. She devoted herself to study and achieved several life coaching certifications. She grew. She started to discover her voice. She learned about business and marketing. She slowly built a client base. She took baby steps and put herself out there. She was drawn to the new science of epigenetics that tells us we can inherit gene changes from traumas that our ancestor’s experiences. These register as physiological changes in our DNA and are passed from generation to generation unless they are cleared. She discovered she had a spiritual gift that helped others to release and clear these ingrained blocks.
Now she has been given the opportunity to take her gift to the next level by allowing herself to be introduced to potentially tens of thousands of people. While this excites her, it challenges her I-don’t-want-to-be-seen-self to its very limits. She’s understandably terrified. But the other day she said this, “I can choose to stay small and quietly, unassumingly go about doing my thing. Or I can live Big. I’m being challenged to grow and that’s what I’m going to do. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy…it will be the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But I don’t want to have regrets in my life. I want to learn the lesson of allowing myself to be seen and get it done with. I don’t want to come back and have to do this all over again.”
I had tears in my eyes. I know how hard this has been.
We get the same lesson over and over until we show mastery. My friend had worked tirelessly in the last few years pushing herself to break free of the confines of her small self. She was driven by a desire so pure in its intent – to make a difference in the lives of others. It’s providing the fuel to make a difference in her own. Her decision to live Big means she’s giving herself permission to shed her armor and walking forward unencumbered.
What armor can you shed?
It’s weighing you down and holding you back from becoming all you were meant to be.
You know courage and daring is coursing through your veins. You can feel it.
You are ready to be seen.
If not You, then who?
If not Now, then when?
Is there a Mantra that will help be seen? Check these out they are Red Shoe Zone approved!
What unexplored adventures await you?
The world is waiting for you Sister!
PS please forward to all women you know who need to hear these words. Then get on with it and share your adventures and glorious successes with all of us.